Division Bells: Ignoring The Bait & Rejecting Friendly Fire

Not a day goes by that I don’t see someone on the internet calling out someone else as a fraud, a grifter, a turncoat…pick your pejorative. I’ve been guilty of this. Maybe you have too, because it’s so easy and so insipidly self-righteous. Partly this division is due to tribalism: the enemy of my friend must be my enemy, we rationalize, but mostly it’s a lack of discernment and a stubborn unwillingness to put matters before the Lord.

It happens in real life, too—that is to say, outside the detached confines of the online universe. We can all probably write a list a mile long cataloging wounds that we or someone close to us have endured from gossip, betrayals, lies, or character assassination. And many of us are quick to tell anyone who’ll listen what so and so did to us, or to someone else, or offer up evidences why person X isn’t to be trusted. Church wounds, slander, sour business deals, bad counsel, misunderstandings, skewed doctrine, all of these (and so many more) are designed by the actual enemy of our souls and employed toward a single goal: division.

The enemy wants us clumped into little enclaves of distrustful clans, constantly sneering at the others, looking for ways to discredit (the trendy buzzword is “expose”) them while the real enemy looms large around us. It takes us off mission, turns us into petty blowhards, and diminishes our efforts toward long-lasting, spiritually significant victories. 

I’m tired of it. I hope you are, too.

It’s easy to get frustrated with our allies. The second I hear someone say something I know to be false, in person or online, my hackles go up. This is especially true when I hear others piling on, parroting what they say. Many people glean a little surface knowledge on a subject and run with it, few people are interested in unpacking topics, examining nuance, counter-arguments, and context.

Those who dig deeper are often rewarded with perspective that blows their presupposition to pieces…but who has time for all that research? When I hear lies, I merely want to correct them. The gentle, substantive conversations required to do so Biblically aren’t always feasible, and people also aren’t always interested in pursuing it. Or they don’t have the time to digest it.

Instead of hearing you out, they might dismiss you, deflect hard questions, dig in their heels, or get offended. Soon everyone is blasting each other with both barrels, and relationships suffer. The once-high opinions we had for one another on important matters (like salvation or core beliefs) are obscured by trivial gripes, and we tend to disassociate from each other.

Let’s not do that anymore.

Let’s be willing to entertain the idea that we may be wrong about issue X, or person A. Let’s give each other the benefit of the doubt, and instead of saying, “He’s a fraud,” or “She’s a liar,” let’s sit down with one another face-to-face to discuss what’s being said. We’re blessed to be living in an era when free, easy conference calls or podcasting is an option for anyone. Instead of calling out or exposing someone in drive-by X posts or YouTube videos, invite them to a table discussion about what they’re saying, advocating, or defending. It’s way more interesting and mature than sparring over a social media thread.

Make acting like a grown-up great again.

Moreover, let’s ask one another from the get-go if the issue in question is even worth arguing about. Is this really something that Jesus wants us focusing on? Or is it a distraction from a larger, more pertinent battle that we could, and by all rights should, be fighting alongside one another?  

We attack those who might otherwise be our allies because it’s so much easier than considering why they disagree with us. Instead, let’s start examining our presuppositions and take everything to God. Also, keep in mind: people change. The person you once trusted absolutely, or the person you long ago determined is a lying scumbag, may be a completely different person now for lots of reasons. God alone is completely true and unchanging.

People can be great sometimes, but sometimes they can really suck, too. Individuals who seem to genuinely love Jesus have sometimes turned out to be flagrant narcissists, underhanded liars, adulterers, serial abusers, or manipulative salesmen with little interest in the Holy Spirit or His work.

In secular circles, businesses I once frequented went fascist overnight. Artists I loved went woke. Leaders I championed compromised. Respected scholars proved gullible dupes.

Our job is not to redeem them, or even call them out necessarily; that’s Jesus’ work.

Our job is to testify to the truth about Him and the things we can verify in our world, regardless of how it’s received. We don’t always get it right at first. That’s fine, so we also need to learn temperance, and generate the humility necessary to repent and make amends to get back on track. We may even need to swallow our pride and ask forgiveness from some people, or forgive them even if they never ask.

It’s hard to admit we were wrong about something; it’s harder to admit we were wrong about something after exhaustively digging in our heels over it. If the Lord just highlighted someone to you, don’t delay. Call ‘em up and do it, because your joy is at stake. It’s also very grownup thing to do.