It seems strangely out of place to see a Ferrari at Target in Wasilla, Alaska, but there it was. I noticed it from across the parking lot as I inched my way up to Walgreens’ drive-thru pharmacy behind four other cars. When I saw the line, I tried going inside to see if the wait was shorter, but no dice, it was ten deep. I figured I might as well sit it out in the comfort of my Suburban.
First I texted my wife, then checked my email. Ooh, need to pay the trash bill, let’s do that now. By the time I’d crossed that off my list, I noticed the red Ferrari. It was a 308 GTB straight out of Magnum, P.I. I probably wouldn’t have noticed it but he’d parked way out in Target’s back nine, pulled in parallel with the aisle line, across six parking spaces.
His goal was either to be highly visible or highly isolated. Either way, mission accomplished. He began to emerge from the Ferrari. I looked at the line of cars in front of me and figured this might be mildly entertaining, so I took out Bishop to try to grab a picture.
Bishop is my phone. I named it after the heroic android from Aliens. If you haven’t a clue what I’m talking about, you should revisit your entertainment choices when you’re done here.
This is Bishop:
This is also Bishop:
I digress. Back to the Ferrari.
I’m sorry to say it was a letdown. The driver side door opened, and hung open for quite a while. Then, very, very slowly, two legs emerged. I put Bishop away and tried not to stare as an elderly gentleman worked hard to steady himself, holding onto the side of his Ferrari. He moved down its length to get his walker out of the trunk, set it up, and then stood next to it for what seemed like an eternity. Someone came up and offered him help, but the old timer waved him off. By this time, there were only two cars ahead of me in the drive-thru.
I had to process this imagery. I was delighted at the old guy’s determination to a) keep a classic luxury car in Alaska, and b) proudly sport it despite the pain its seating design must’ve played on his tender frame. I love old men, especially ones with character, and this guy had it in spades.
Now I was smiling, pondering how I’d play at his age. My toddler started getting antsy in the back seat. I gave Bishop to the kids and let them pass the remaining wait time in the company of Google Play Movies and Cars 3.
We live in a marvelous age. In the time I spent waiting in line, I’d answered four emails, paid one bill, taken a couple of pictures and written a lot of this post. I also chatted with my wife, sent her a phenomenal GIF, and watched ten minutes of a movie in HD that just came out last year, all from a little piece of metal and glass in my pocket.
Someday Bishop will be as old as the Ferrari, and I’ll be as old as the guy driving it. I hope on that day, some guy sitting near me will look over, smile and appreciate the old timer sporting an antique Galaxy 8 with his purple headphones, watching Rogue One.
